Don't It Make My Black Eyes Green, Review, Supernatural 10x3, "Soul Survivor"

Irony of ironies, I had no time to write about last week's excellent episode, "Reichenbach".  We had Tiny Crazed Marine getting the shit beaten out of him, Crowley staring longingly at a hilarious picture of him and Dean wearing oversized cowboy hats, a great ending where Dean says Baby is "just a car".  So, was I ever pumped for this week's episode, "Soul Survivor." Especially the promos looked so great, and it was directed by Dean Winchester himself, Jensen Ackles.

DISCLAIMER: My husband, the all-time baseball fan, actually stopped watching Game 1 of the World Series so I could watch "Supernatural"!  Then he couldn't get it on the radio, didn't know how to live stream on his new laptop, nothing.  So he went slumping off to bed.  The only thing that would have helped my massive guilt was a kick-ass episode.

First, I have to address the CW PR folks:  YOU ARE EVIL. YOU LIE. I HATE YOU.  "The Year of The Deanmon"?  Three episodes, I don't give a shit if he has the Mark of Cain, that's he's all 'roided up and wants to kill, I want Dean to be a demon, goddammit!  If not, I wanted Sam to save him!  Not have Cas swoop in like a series regular ex machina and finish the job.  What a bummer.  Even Kevin Tran knew how to have a bucket of holy water over the door.  And the Winchesters had once fought off demons used lawn sprinklers full of holy water!  If only Sam had done something clever and unexpected, instead of expeditious.

Second, the Deadly Duo Bruckner and Leming wrote "Soul Survivor," and they retconned Sam's "monstrous" actions.  Accidentally selling a guy's soul and then the guy gets killed?  Sam, buddy, you have mowed down HOW many demons in human vessels? Triple digits?  You drank demon blood, killed a nurse, betrayed your brother more times than I can count--and that's only the beginning! "Who's the real monster"??  Sam should've said, "Go fuck yourself, Dean, you're a demon, case closed."

I was hoping for THIS:



AND THIS:


This is really incredibly scary and disturbing...me likey.

FOR AT LEAST MORE THAN THREE EPISODES!

NOW:  Sam looks hot.  There's "Dr. Sexy"!  He scores some pure nun's blood, because if he used his own, dollars to donuts Dean would have turned into Satan.


Priest doesn't find Sam attractive because he's over 12

Sam ties Dean to a chair and demonic handcuffs, so for once Sam isn't tied up.  I can't tell you how relieved I was.  Maybe it was an omen of the series trying out new things?

Oops.  Sam'll be back in the chair next week, I promise you.

“Your guilt-ridden, weight-of-the-world bro has been MIA for quite some time now. But I’m loving the new model: Lean, mean Dean.” So do I, Demon Dean, so do I.  The abuse that Dean hurls at his brother is so old it's got chin hair.  You killed Mom. Dad was an asshole.  You're a pussy.  You're not my brother.


"Well, aren't you just too precious for this world, darlin'."

The Dean/Sam chase scene in the bunker would have been more exciting if I hadn't seen it in the promos more times than Sam has killed demons.  But even so, it was well done. My favorite part was when Sam locked down the bunker and everything was bathed in red light.  There was a Kubrick homage when Dean smashed down the door, hissing, "I like the disease".  Both Jensen Ackles and Jared Padalecki acted the hell out of their scenes together, including Sam's terror and unwillingness to kill his brother.

I'm a little distracted by Sam's hair.

Sam looooves Dean too much to kill him, then Cas grabs him from behind.  There's some nice contrasty vfx in their eye color (black and blue), Dean is tied down, and wakes up all "bzuh?"

This had better be a major fake-out, or else.

Sam's all happy and promptly leaves to buy Dean junk food, asking Cas to keep an eye on him.  Cas talks to Dean for a few minutes and then goes back to the angel in the car outside.

Crowley: bored in hell, finds Cas because he wants Cas to follow Dean.  Which Cas and Hannah were doing anyway.  However, Crowley scooped out a rogue angel's mojo, feeds it to Cas, and hoopla!  It's like Alka-Seltzer for bad hangover, Castiel is fine and ready to go to work.  Crowley, sitting in a dime store version of Hell's Throne Room (seriously, couldn't they have thrown a little more money to the designer for that set?) has demons pissed at him for...something.

"You should be grateful I'm a regular, because I'm the only lively thing in this sodding episode."

Castiel: dying, then not dying, telling Hannah not to get any ideas because they are on mission.

"What kind of stupid angel crap do you think the writers will come up with next?"
"I'd be fine with us banging each other."
"That would work."

She presumably waits in the car while Castiel grabs Dean before Dean puts a hammer in Sam's head.  Dean wakes up no longer a demon.  Cas leaves shortly thereafter.

Dean stares at old family photos.  I was so hoping he would tear them in half, but no, he sits there.

How's that for a wham-bam finish?

Oh, wait, there's a bit in Tulsa where a redhead who's not Abbadon sips Scotch and has pinned two dead guys on the ceiling.  As you do.

Next week: stuff.  God, I'm bored even typing it out. Thanks for the catharthis, gang.